Saturday, December 1, 2001
The first day of December and the first day of my vacation. The first day I go to the image consultant. I've already started with the personal trainer early. Over the next two weeks, I'm going to get my life back in order. I'm going to do all the cleaning that I've been neglecting. I'm going to file all the papers that needed kept. I'm going to scan any documents that I don't need as a hard copy. I'm going to shred everything else. I'm going to finish the picture-scanning project that I took on months ago. My spreadsheet to-do list already has 50 items.

Two weeks. Two weeks to make my life more simple. Two weeks to start getting in shape and starting forming better habits. And with the money I save by not traveling, a personal trainer and an image consultant.

This is the last month of my Twenties -- if you can call that a chapter. And really, it has been. My Thirties loom on the horizon, and they are going to be wonderful. I can feel it, and I'm going to make it happen.

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Today was sort of a preparation day. I did some cleaning around the apartment and such. But, I did go out tonight and had some fun. My neighbor and I had dinner. Then he took me a biker bar!

This picture doesn't even begin to do justice to how many bikes were there. It was an ocean. Unfortunately, my other pictures didn't turn out; we never got out of the car, so that made photography interesting at best... It also stirred up a few interesting looks.

I wouldn't have minded stopping and having an "experience" but I was way over dressed to fit in, and we were on our way to have some wine anyway.

Well, okay -- champaign and port. But, this picture was actually the second place we went to; we had wine at the first.

A quick trip to the "Evil Empire" (Starbucks) next-door, and then home to talk with Shack on the phone before crashing.

Sunday, December 2, 2001
Bright and early -- about 11:30. I woke up, drove down to the bridge, and did some jogging. That's a first for me. The job wasn't as fun as it might have been. Well, it wasn't really fun at all. But I felt better later! And walking back to the car, I chatted for a while with the park ranger who monitors the area. Quite a cuttie, him.

Quick shower, some dancing, and then off to grab lunch and do errands. My image consultant wanted me to pick up some mid-calf boots before our next appointment on Wednesday. So, I went off to the mall to do shopping. I hate shopping for shoes. I have big feet. Ten and a half. Well, actually the woman who measured me said they were a normal ten. But for some reason, those don't really fit me. I have a high instep, apparently.

Shoe shopping took about three hours. I probably wouldn't have found anything at all, but the woman who helped me at Nordstroms was super-great. I'm so excited about my new boots that I might go out and buy more! I've never had expensive shoes before.

Monday, December 3, 2001
Okay, I have to quit dancing in the apartment. I go on and on for an hour, two hours, whatever... and then I'm tired. I lay down and go back to sleep for hours. It happened last night when I got home and it happened this morning.

And every time I sit down at the computer without knowing what I want to do, it's like watching TV. If I'm not sitting down to watch a show, I get trapped in hours of channel surfing. Sure, it's cool sometimes; but I'm getting sucked in a lot.

Today though, I'm just generally depressed. It's not the Internet's fault. Although, 'IT' was a huge let down. Everyone knew 'IT' would be. The technology is interesting. That may get used somewhere in the future, perhaps. But the scooter itself? Great toy -- except that it doesn't go very fast and is expensive as hell. Expect to see these when you're shopping for an apartment in a couple years. <yawn>

Shack got a rejection letter today for the job in LA. The news sent me sulking right back to bed. Now it's almost 7pm. How do I sleep so much? A medical miracle -- or disaster -- I'm sure.

I'm not sure what he's going to do. When I was shopping yesterday, the mall wasn't nearly as packed as I remember for this time of year. "We might be having a recession," they say. It made me wonder if that was the reason I was getting the great customer service. I mean, the woman who helped me with my boots took me upstairs and introduced me to someone who could help me pick out some pants. Of course, my jeans maybe are that bad.

This whole job market thing. It's like I've been transported into an alternate reality. About ten years when I did my "transition" it was impossible for me to keep a job. I went from a pretty okay job waiting tables to doing housekeeping at a motel, because it was all I could find. I was fired in two weeks. They told me I was "making the beds wrong." Yea, sure. Then I worked a hole-in-the-wall dinner until a couple people suddenly got weirded out, and I was fired from that place too. I found a wait job at a respectable restaurant until that ended suddenly after about two months. Too many compliments, maybe? Evil bitch. And finally two fast food jobs and a telemarketing gig (I hate telemarketers) until I went back to college.

During that period I was actually laughed at on two interviews. And no family support; when I came out originally to my parents, I had to leave the house. Evil world.

Say hello to my alter-reality. Yes, that's right. I'm a vengeance demon -- like Anya on Buffy, or maybe even the evil Willow. Except, not nearly as sexy. Just wait until I meet someone and start dating! The whole world will be single, except for me and... my pet rock? We do have a great relationship. Who knows what could happen?

Anyway, I'm not a very competent vengeance demon. I feel terrible. And helpless, because there is really nothing I can do to help. Except sleep all day apparently...